This return

crept up on me. I had no idea it would be so soon.

I'm afraid in some way. Although I have no reason to fear. You're always going to hold this strange
juxtaposition for me.

I can only wait and see can't I?

It's frustrating how I'm this life's owner, and yet have no remote control to it.
All I have is time and the choice to allow it to pass, to allow the scene to play out.

We'll see then.

Inconsistency between actions and promises

reveal lies

I'm trying to find my 'burden'. Do I think I know what it is, or am I just confusing myself? Am I rejecting what the Lord is saying to me because I don't want to hear that answer? After all this time. I still have my attachments. Is it my wishful thinking or is it really the path that He has for me?

Does it matter? Throw it upon the shoulders of the Lord, and rest in Him.

Lord, I pray that you'll take away the confusion.